The cold, wet days of February are perfect for prayer, reading, writing, contemplation of the deep questions of life, and listening for leadings and inspirations. It's time, though, to step out of the cloister a little and gently re-enter the world of personal relationships. In February I consider love, family, and friendships, as well as self-love and care.
February is also a time of clearing away the excess to make room for growth. I prune my trees, I prune out clutter in my home, and in my heart and my mind. The weather can be frustrating, though; I long to get outside to dig and to feel the sun! I need patience - I know the seeds are growing underground and the ideas are growing in my heart - warmth and sustenance will bring the growth I want.
Agenda:
1. Love intentions
2. February queries
3. Every day love rituals:
Love is the key to happiness and success in all areas. Life is lived in relationship- in community- and no matter how brilliant and effective I am, I will struggle if I have poor connections with the people in my life. Love is also a frame for my bond with the earth, with Spirit, and with myself.
Love is a practice, not a belief or feeling. It’s a set of habits learned over a lifetime: Listening, giving, speaking and acting in a loving way. It’s a way of being, with my attention on compassion, patience, generosity, kindness, and understanding.
Maybe because I've felt socially inept most of my life, I wrote and compiled what I call my Love Cycle: Every year on the first of February I start this 30-day round of daily love practices, which help me to cultivate and improve the habits that allow me to keep love central in my life, and in my everyday interactions.
Today I will list 4 specific goals for improvement this month - these could be a change in attitude, a person I want to show more love to, a habit I want to improve, or a service to share - and I will brainstorm small but concrete actions for each of these goals, and put them on my To-Do list.
My intention for love:
I intend to love my family, friends, neighbors, community, animal people, and earth with all my heart, giving full attention, patience, and respect, and offering generous service, because practicing love is how I connect with God, and it is the only thing that will save us.
2. February queries:
To whom do I want to extend the pink light of Love?
What is the clutter in my heart that I can prune away?
3. Everyday rituals:
I'm very attached to daily rituals that ground me in the seasons and cycles of the year, but I read a new thought (for me): That rituals are a patterned way to enact the moral emotions of compassion, awe, empathy, gratitude, joy (and so on). So I've been thinking about how this is true for me, and which moral emotions I'd like to ritualize, and how.
Equanimity ritual: I try to remember to use what I call my "zen pause" when I'm waiting, or my patience is challenged by someone:
1. Plant feet firmly on the earth (picture a mountain - be a mountain); name how I am feeling.
2. Touch heart, and soften (relax shoulders, slow breathing); hold my feelings in love and light.
3. Touch head, open mind, and expand thinking. Embrace the paradox of chaos and the still center.
Care ritual: It's easy to practice care when you get to change, feed, and entertain a toddler 4 days a week, but how do I enact care on the other 3 days a week?
4. Home simplicity:
February is when I feel a big urge to purge and simplify every room in the house - to keep only the things I need and find beautiful, and give away the rest. Clearing even a small space, like my sock drawer or kitchen table, gifts me with feeling of peace and joy.
I've read many books over the years and my hands-down favorite is Marie Kondo's "The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing". It's hard to say why, but something about her views spark me creatively. Her technique is to sort everything in one category at one time- pull all your clothing out and see what you have, then put back only what you really love and get rid of the rest.
I'm mostly to a point of maintenance now, and honing my spaces for a serene, clean look. Some rooms still need more clearing, and all rooms have new clutter that needs a home. My plan this month is to:
I've read many books over the years and my hands-down favorite is Marie Kondo's "The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing". It's hard to say why, but something about her views spark me creatively. Her technique is to sort everything in one category at one time- pull all your clothing out and see what you have, then put back only what you really love and get rid of the rest.
I'm mostly to a point of maintenance now, and honing my spaces for a serene, clean look. Some rooms still need more clearing, and all rooms have new clutter that needs a home. My plan this month is to:
- Re-examine all my stuff one room at a time, and see what else I'm ready to let go of.
- Find new, creative ways to store my stuff so it looks tidy and is easy to put away. Aim for "minimalistic abundance".
- Return to the habit of putting things away immediately - no more stacking! (This is an integrity ritual: The practice of cleaning up after myself and putting everything back in its home spot!)
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