Loving Kindness

My theme this month is receptivity and love. The habits of love include generosity, honesty, patience and equanimity, forgiveness, gratitude, communication, respect, kindness and care - among others. 

Today I'm thinking about loving-kindness, our outward expression of day-to-day love. I practice kindness with polite language, and other small acts and habits like gracefully waiting my turn, using a friendly tone of voice, offering help, giving a compliment, or a simple smile. When I'm at my best, I extend kindness to friends and family, co-workers, neighbors, strangers and service workers, and also to animals, plants, and to the Earth.

We begin to learn to be kind when we are small, so we should be experts, but we still manage to be rude and hurtful at least sometimes, maybe unintentionally, and if not out loud, at least in our thoughts.

My own growing edge is to remember to be kind in the face of the meanness of others; to "counter the barrage of contempt and disrespect in the world by bringing forth a kinder, gentler presence," as Marvin Thomas says in "Personal Village". I practice by using kind words in my inner dialogue (“She has a generous heart” rather than “What an idiot.”).

Agenda:

1. Start a Love Journal

2. Pink Light of Love meditation
3. Read from two books
4. Visualize God

5. Speak little, listen much

Sabbath for Recovery

It's been a wild few days! We have a tiny new grandson! 

And we've spent the last three days and nights with our first born grandson, who is not quite three yet. We've had some tears and tantrums - the pains of being away from Mommy for the first time - but also some really sweet cuddles.

Today we hope the family will be re-united, and we will get to recover a little bit.

Agenda:

1. Recovery plans

2. Prepare for Imbalc

3. Practice a Reverent Way of Being

4. Write about my seeds of inspiration

5. House clearing

Late January First Quarter moon

Photo by Alan Gillespie

At the First Quarter Moon we are one-quarter of the way through the moon cycle. The moon is waxing - growing in light and energy, creating a time for decisive action. Kiki Ely, in her book Living Lunerly, says, "A good way to remember this is by looking at the perfect line of shadow down the moon's center: this is the moment to draw a firm line, boundary, or decision in your life and stick to it."

I use this late January quarter moon's energy to actively gather in and nurture all the seeds of projects, relationships, and organizations that are under my care; I use obstacles as fuel for growth and show full effort for my priorities. 

Agenda:
1. Journal queries

2. Resolutions review

3. Make a Full Effort Plan

4. Write a mission haiku

Vasant Panchami

Today is the first day of spring in India; Vasant means "spring" and Panch means "fifth", and it is celebrated on the fifth day after the new moon in January or February.

Vasant Panchami is also the birthday of Saraswati, the Hindu Goddess of education, learning, and the fine arts. Folks all over India take part in art and painting competitions, poetry recitations, and music festivals today. Students will take a break from studying, and put their books on the altar to be blessed.

Agenda today:

1. Look for signs of spring
2. Make a rangoli
3. Start a new project
4. Make moong dal (yellow lentils)

Sanctuary

A sanctuary is a sanctum, a sacred and protected place of beauty, grace and refuge. Our home and garden is a sanctuary for body and soul; it embraces us and brings us back to center. When we take sanctuary, even for brief moments, we are re-created, recharged, healed, soothed, comforted and at peace.

This week I hope to continue to define and upgrade our sanctum; it's an ongoing discipline of inner work (seeking inspiration, and upgrading my habits) and projects (creating a place of peace that expresses who we are).

Agenda:

1. Journal queries on home and family

2. Word #4 - Discipline

3. Resolutions review

4. Sanctuary practices

1. Journal queries on home and family:

These are queries from the North Pacific Yearly Meeting book of Faith and Practice--

How do we make our homes places of friendliness, peace, and renewal, where God is real for those who live there and those who visit?

How do we maintain a climate of love and trust in our meeting which invites families to be open about their satisfactions and challenges? 

How do we keep commitments outside the home from encroaching on the time and loving attention the family needs for its health and well-being? 

Does our home life support our need for both a sense of personal identity and shared living? 

What supports do we offer to the aging, the widowed, the separated or divorced, and members of families affected by disruption or trauma? 

How does the meeting assist families to improve communication, family life, and the rearing of children in a context of love?

2. Word #4 - Discipline:

I'm reading a Pendle Hill pamphlet called Marking the Quaker Path: Seven Key Words Plus One, by Robert Griswold. This speaks to the condition of many Friends in my Meeting, who are ready to go deeper on this journey, and a large group of us are studying this booklet together this year.

The word this month is Discipline, which I started write about yesterday.

Discipline is a muscle that requires exercise. Being a Quaker is like perfecting a craft. "The discipline needed is the discipline of Quaker practice called 'good order' or 'Gospel order'. ... Our outrageous aim as Quakers is to discern the truth of Reality - and align our actions with the truth. We won't come close to that goal without discipline".

Quaker practice is slippery, because it doesn't have a set form. Early Quakers saw that the prayers and ceremonies of the Church were easily corrupted and could become prideful, so we have adopted the "discipline of silent presence." 

Griswold suggests that our personal practice should include daily silence, study, encouraging other Friends to question us about our inner life and the trajectory our life is taking, and deep listening to what is said by others. He says our spiritual disciplines are like tending the inner garden.

He also says that committee work is essential: "When we work with other Friends we learn that some of the certainties ... we have been carrying need to be examined. The Light coming through other Friends may shine into corners unfamiliar to us... Sharing work teaches us to bring our love, courage, and patience to our service. These lessons do not take root in us by our thinking about them or wishing for them. They become our humble strength by practice".

He ends this section by talking about the importance of listening  deeply to each other. "To build the trust needed for us to work together we need to cultivate a heart that can hear and eyes that can see all that is said or not said. ... As Friends we are required to cultivate the discipline of listening compassionately ..."

3. Resolutions review:

Speaking of discipline, I'm reviewing my New Year's resolutions this week and setting some small practices. I talked about my first resolution yesterday. The second is: 

Sanctuary: I intend to care for my land with discipline and ritual, and create a home that is a peaceful and well-ordered sanctuary for those I love, because maintaining my land in good order is the honorable and sustainable thing to do, and is one way that I show reverence for the Earth and for God.

What I like about this resolution is that it encompasses my home, my land, my family and friends, the Earth and God. It helps me to de-compartmentalize my life and see it as a whole.

 

4. Sanctuary practices: 

• Cleaning: I'm finishing up a month of cleaning away the mold and mildew in my house, and this week I'll work on our bedroom and my study, cleaning the mildew from the walls and windows with detergent and warm water, then use a solution of Borax, and don't rinse, to help prevent mold from growing again.
  
• Farming: I've re-introduced ducks to our land, after a two month break (Welcome home Permelia, and our new Swedish duck, Anka!) The practice of opening the coop at dawn, feeding, cleaning, and putting them to bed again at dusk feels like a healing connection to the land.
• Team talk: Last year I began a practice of printing out a daily page of garden inspiration and the day's list of garden tasks, putting it on a clipboard and finding a few minutes in the morning to discuss them with my partner. It was helpful for us both to have a discipline of talking and listening to each other (you'd think after almost 50 years together we'd have that down, but no) and the visuals gave us a starting place for musing about possibilities. I need to institute this practice again!
• Grandson projects: I want to include my grandson more often in cleaning, gardening, cooking, and farm work. This week I'll pick one task to engage him in each day he's with us.

Gnothi Seauton

On New Year's Day I put the Greek Delphic injunction on my altar - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself. I've been working to know myself better for many years, and to understand my unique temperament and personality style. Knowing myself has allowed me to make better decisions, express what I need and want in life, and understand what motivates me to resist bad habits and develop good ones.

Agenda:

1. Review my personality

2. Word #4 - Discipline

3. Review my resolutions

4. Create inner synergy

Chinese New Year of the Rabbit

Today is the Chinese New Year, which starts when the new moon appears in China (one day off from the new moon here, which rose yesterday). 

This is the month of the Holiday Moon and the year of the Rabbit! In Chinese culture, the Rabbit is a symbol of longevity, peace and prosperity. 2023 is predicted to be a year of hope. People born in the Year of the Rabbit are believed to be vigilant, witty, quick-minded and ingenious. 

The first day of the Chinese New Year is called Yüan-tan, the "Day of Origin". This one day determines the luck for the entire year, so Chinese people are careful to use their best manners and to remain honest and peaceful.

Agenda for today: 

1. Read "It's a Meaningful Life"

2. Eat jai for breakfast
3. Give gifts

4. Make and give hóngbāo (money packets)

Chinese New Year's Eve and New Holiday Moon

Tonight is Chinese New Year's Eve. In China, New Year's evening is called Ch’u-yeh, the "evening of discarding", because we can finally be done with the old year, and with winter.

This last day of the year is busy for Chinese families, because it’s the last chance to complete preparations and be ready to start the year fresh. When the running around is done, the family spends the rest of the day at home together -- family connections are the big theme for this holiday.

Tonight is also the new moon. This first new moon of the Chinese year is called the Holiday Moon, because it's the start of a month-long holiday season in China. The new moon is a time of high energy and clear thinking. Historically, the new moon is when women took time to be alone; it's a time to retreat, set intentions, and initiate something new.

Agenda:

1. Retreat Day

2. Choose a month theme

3. Set intentions

4. New moon altar and meditation

5. Thanksgiving ceremony

6. Welcoming ceremony

7. Have a family open house

Babinden

The Slavic holiday Babinden (bah-bean-den) happens each year on January 21. Baba is "grandmother", and the in is possessive; den is "day", so the meaning is "Grandmother’s Day". It’s also called Midwives Day.

Babinden is an ancient festival, still celebrated in Bulgaria, to give thanks and show respect to the women (or men) who have helped in the child-birthing process, and for all the other skills and knowledge the grandmothers have: Growing food, cooking, herb lore, looking after their grandchildren, and teaching folklore and traditions.

The roots of this festival, however, are in fertility rites. In Bulgaria, a house full of healthy and beautiful children is a basic value, and this is the underlying focus of the rituals on Babinden. Fertility is an essential theme of nature, and today I celebrate the place my grandson has in the great, burgeoning, hope-filled circle of abundance, and my role as one of his care-givers.

Agenda today:
1. Journal queries
2. Hand-washing ceremony

3. Prayer for grandmothers

4. Art with a toddler
5. House blessing

Martin Luther King Jr. Day

Today is Martin Luther King Jr. Day - Today I am reminded again to honor the ongoing struggle for freedom, equality, and dignity for all people, and share in the efforts.

Agenda for today:

1. Intentions

2. Study

3. March

4. Index to MLK Day projects

January Intention Setting

January is my month to be still, listen within, discern my next steps, and set intentions for the year; to get my ducks in a row!

I've already chosen a theme for the year - Being Rooted:

Roots are our connection to the deeper places in our souls, to the past, and to the land we live on. Being rooted gives one a secure sense of who you are and where you belong; you are firmly planted, sunk in, feet on the ground and the earth is steady. 

To be rooted means I belong here: Strong and grounded in Love, Truth, and Creation, solidly living in the Now, connected to the Divine Whole, and radiant in peace, in health and resilience. It means I belong in my home, my family, and in my community; I'm integrated and whole. 

My next steps today are to review my core values, set some intentions that capture the possibility of daily right action, and plan ways to build intention into my daily routine.

Agenda:

1. Read It's a Meaningful Life

2. Define my values

3. Identify Essential Intentions

4. Set intentions for my priorities

5. Create an intentions ritual

Little New Year

Kitchen God I drew a few years ago.

Today is called Little New Year - it falls one week before Chinese New Year. Little New Year is also known as the Kitchen God Festival because this is the day that the Kitchen God, Tsao-wang, and his wife, Wang Bo-jia, leave to report to heaven. A picture of these two gods, printed or drawn on rice paper, hangs in a niche just above the stove in a Chinese home. 

This holiday always falls on the waning Third Quarter moon of January or February. Today's waning third quarter moon energy is yin - quiet, internal, heart-driven, intentional Being-ness. At this phase we can ease off a bit on actively pursuing goals, slow down, go within, and attend to inner work, renewal, and self-care.

Agenda today:

1. Renewal plan
2. Evaluation House

3. Monthly journal brainstorm

4. Kitchen God Good-bye Ceremony

5. Living room blessing

Pongal

Pongal is a four day harvest festival celebrated in India, beginning on January 13th or 14th. The word Pongal means “overflowing and abundance”. It's celebrated as a shift in the season - the end of winter - the day on which the sun begins to move northwards

I appreciate this extra reminder of the returning light: The sun is a symbol of wisdom, divine knowledge and spiritual light, and now it is turning towards us and blessing us with life and energy.

Each day of Pongal has a slightly different focus and theme: 

Today is called Bhogi Pongal, which means "enjoy abundance"; it's a day to honor the rain god, Indra, for providing rain for the harvest. Today farmers anoint their plows and sickles with sandalwood paste to bless them, then bring in the fresh harvest of rice and sugar cane.

 

The second day is called Surya Pongal, named for the sun god, Lord Surya. On this day people cook sweet rice at sunrise, and watch for the rice to bubble out of the clay pot. The boiling over symbolizes good luck and prosperity for the family.

 

The third day is Mattu Pongal, focusing on the cattle who pull the plows. (Mattu means "cow".) The cows are cleaned, decorated and fed treats.

 

The fourth day is Kanum Pongal. Kanum means "to view": It's a day to visit friends and family.

Agenda for Pongal:

1. House clearing
2. Have a fire ceremony
3. Make a rangoli

4. Make Pongal Paanai (Sweet Rice)

5. Recite the Surya Mantra

Prepare for Chinese New Year

Chinese New Year is in a week and a half, on January 22nd this year. I love having this second opportunity to mark the new year; this one is my "Happy and Lucky" celebration.

In China a whole month is spent in preparations - cleaning, cooking, and decorating the house. All of the things displayed at Chinese New Year are symbols of the ideal life - tokens and reminders of the good things we hope for: Luck, wealth, long life, and happiness.

Agenda this week:
1. Shopping

2. House cleaning

3. Nian-hua and good-luck calligraphy:

4. Forced Blossoms
5. Make Jiao-zi dumplings
6. Make a Tray of Togetherness

Plow Monday

Plow Monday, the first Monday after Epiphany, is the traditional day in Europe for farmers to restart their farm work. 

Our garden isn't large, but I think of it as my miniature farm. Normally, it's too wet at this time in the Pacific Northwest to do any digging, but many other tasks are possible, and it's good motivation for me to have this set date each year to start my “farm work”.

I got a lot of good permaculture information from Amy of the Ten-Acre Farm.  Amy says,

"January is one of my favorite times of year because I love the opportunity to start anew, make new agreements with myself about how I will spend time in the garden, and determine what kinds of experiments I will run to continue learning and improving."

 

Agenda for today & this week: 

1. Journal query

2. Tool blessing ceremony

3. January harvest

4. Garden planing

5. Daily garden visits

6. Make plough pudding

Sabbath for Self Care

Today is my sabbath. It's been a few weeks since I last had an entire day that was unscheduled. In the best world, everyone would have one whole day each week to spend as we want; to stay in bed, read a good book, take a slow walk or do a crossword; one whole day to do no work, run no errands, send no emails, and clean no toilets.

I'm ready to settle into a sabbath frame of mind, and today my theme is self-care: I'm going to think about taking care of myself, and put some new practices into effect, because ... today is my birthday, and I want to indulge myself in a way that will promote health! 

Agenda today:

1. All day stillness meditation

2. Read Writing and Being

3. Journal exploration

4. Resolutions postcard for 2023

5. Self-Care ritual

6. Clean and clear the livingroom

Distaff Day

Woman with distaff in left hand, and spindle in right hand.

Distaff Day (January7) is named for the distaff, the stick-like tool that held fibers while a woman used a drop spindle to spin thread.

Spinning and weaving were never-ending chores for pre-industrial women; most women and girls would spin thread while also cooking, caring for children, or minding the sheep. Because women were seen always with a distaff in hand, it became the symbol of “women’s work”. 

But during the Christmas season women took a break from spinning. January 7th was the traditional day for women to start back to work, and so was called Distaff Day.

Agenda:
1. Journal queries and spindle meditation

2. Start a fiber project

3. Household order

4. Kitchen blessing

5. Kitchen Blessing Prayer

Epiphany and Full Wolf Moon

January 6th is Epiphany, the final day of the Christmas season. This was the day when the three Magi arrived in Bethlehem to see the baby Jesus, and recognized that he would grow up to be a great helper of people.

Epiphany comes from the Greek epiphania, meaning manifestation, or moment of recognition. The Magi had an epiphany- a moment of recognition, when the truth became clear through something simple and striking.

And tonight is the Full moon of January, called atalka - the "Stay Inside Moon" - by the Kalapuya of my area, and the Wolf Moon by others, because of the hungry packs of wolves that used to roam for prey at this time of deep winter. The full Wolf Moon is a good time to ponder what I am hungry for, and how to be resilient.

Photo by Alan Gillespie

We are now at the peak of the strong-energy yang phase of the waxing moon, and will soon begin the quiet-energy yin time of the waning moon. The full moon shines her light on everything; use the full moon energy for creatively completing things, and for seeing your next moves, and also to CELEBRATE how far you've come and give thanks for the lessons learned and the blessings received.

Agenda for today:

1. Epiphany queries

2. Vision walk

3. Celebrate stillness

4. Begin to update my Vision Poster

5. Bake a King's cake

6. Make a crown

Twelfth Night

The evening of January 5th is called Twelfth Night, the Eve of the Epiphany, the night that the three Magi traveled to Bethlehem to see the newborn baby Jesus.

In Italy, the Befana (short for Epiphania) was busy sweeping her floor that night, when the Magi stopped at her house. They invited her to come along with them on their trip to see Jesus but she said she was too busy.

Later she changed her mind and decided to follow, but she couldn’t find them. She continues her search each year on Twelfth Night, flying on a broom, going from house to house and leaving gifts.

Agenda:

1. Journal queries

2. Sweeping

3. Make Focaccia della Befana

4. Leave gifts

My Year of Being Rooted

2023 is my Year of Being Rooted. But what does that mean?

Roots are our connection to the deeper places in our souls, to the past, and to the land we live on. Being rooted gives one a secure sense of who you are and where you belong; you are firmly planted, sunk in, feet on the ground and the earth is steady. 

To be rooted means I belong here: Strong and grounded in Love, Truth, and Creation, solidly living in the Now, connected to the Divine Whole, and radiant in peace, in health and resilience. It means I belong in my home, my family, and in my community, I'm integrated and whole. 

Agenda:

1. Christmas retreat

2. Root reading

3. Root practice ideas for January

4. Root walk 

Final Days of Christmas

We have three days of Christmas left! By now, most people are fed up with holidays and ready to get back to "normalcy" - but I'm holding on for my full 12-days-worth.

Agenda:

1. Christmas retreat

2. Integrity reading

3. Clarify my motivations

4. Prayer candle ceremony

5. Clean and clear the kitchen

Kakizome Day

Today is Kakizome Day; kakizome means "first writing". Today people all over Japan will take time to use a brush and sumi ink to write out a favorite quote or phrase - the first calligraphy of the new year. Kakizome is a way to express your positive wishes for the New Year. 

Agenda:

1. Christmas retreat

2. Discernment reading

3. Year of Being Rooted

4. Practice my calligraphy

5. Wassail my apple tree!