Tuesday Listening

Tuesday is my day to look at my social and emotional self, make an effort to shift my perspectives around how I view and treat the people in my life, and get ready for a week of fun activities with my grandsons.

Agenda:

1. Read "Tiny Habits"

2. Choose behaviors for equanimity

3. New narrative for equanimity

4. Create clarity

Tuesday for Equanimity

Tuesday is my day to look at my social and emotional self, make an effort to shift my perspectives around how I view and treat the people in my life, and get ready for a week of fun activities with my grandsons.

Agenda:

1. Read "Tiny Habits"

2. Explore behaviors for equanimity

2. Beginning script for equanimity

4. New narrative for equanimity

Tuesday

Tuesday is my day to look at my social and emotional self, make an effort to shift my perspectives around how I view and treat the people in my life, and get ready for a week of fun activities with my grandsons.

Agenda:

1. Read "Tiny Habits"

2. Expressing Needs in the World

3. New narrative for presence

4. Monthly journal brainstorm

5. Brainstorm my equanimity

6. Cleansing

Tuesday for Equanimity

Tuesday is my day to look at my social and emotional self, make an effort to shift my perspectives around how I view and treat the people in my life, and get ready for a week of fun activities with my grandsons.

And today is Grandson #1's sixth birthday!

Agenda:

1. Read "Intrinsic Hope"

2. Expressing Needs in the World

3. New narrative for equanimity + Equanimity Practice

Sixth Day of Christmas

This is the sixth day of Christmas, and time to wrap things up for this old year! Today we are packing for a train trip to visit family, so I will push myself to Get Things Done, so I can enjoy a few days of total relaxation.

This morning I will begin to bring thoughts of the New Year into focus. It's an introspective time- standing at the door of the year, looking backward and forward. It's my habit to reflect on the past and also to ponder the year ahead- consider my true purpose and envision hopes for myself and my world.

Agenda Today:

1. Kwanzaa principle

2

.

 

Light a candle for peace and equanimity

3. Read "Present Moment Awareness"

4. Soyal retreat practices for equanimity

5. Equanimity brainstorm

Gratitude and Mindfulness

Will gratitude work for me? Today I'm trying to parse the resistance I have to gratitude: It feels too easy, too superficial. How can it be the fix all it's said to be? Also, it's boring - I am grateful for my house and my grandchildren, yada yada yada. Also, it feels like a  form of denial, of minimizing my true experiences and feelings, and all the terrible shit going on around me.

Sile Walsh says, "Positivity can be as destructive to authenticity as can depression, they are both extremes that pull us from our own balance, our own grey areas, our process of being in life fully. They both have a way of coloring life in a certain light, a light we can tolerate. ... Be grateful for what you do have, seek comfort in knowing that life isn’t always the way we want — for any of us. ... appreciate the crap for what it is — crap. “Right now is crap. Can we be grateful for the reality established between us?

The dark side of gratitude is that it sounds great and can be easily misused. Mind yourself, mind your heart, mind your emotions, they hold the key to the balance we all seek.”

Agenda Today:

1. Gratitude list

2. 

Read 

"Mindfulness-Based Emotional Balance Workbook"

3. Mindful Thinking journal

May Third Quarter Moon

Today is the third Quarter moon. This waning third quarter moon energy is yin - quiet, internal, heart-driven, intentional Being-ness. At this phase we can ease off a bit on actively pursuing goals, slow down, go within, and attend to inner work, renewal, and self-care.

I've made a backwards calendar, with the first steps I'm taking for my big Flow Project, and I expect that more will be revealed as I progress. Today's steps are to:

Agenda Today:

1. 

Read 

"Mindfulness-Based Emotional Balance Workbook"

2. Mindful Thinking plan

3.

 Renewal plan

4. Evaluation House

5. Monthly journal brainstorm

Chaharshanbe Suri Eve

Chaharshanbe Suri, the Festival of Fire, is part of the ten day Zoroastrian festival, Farvardegan, which concludes with Nowruz, the Persian New Year, on March 21. On this last Tuesday evening of the year, Iranians jump over bonfires.

Agenda:

1. Love meditation

2. Read "Mindfulness-Based Emotional Balance Workbook"

3. Make Ajeel

4. Build a fire and JUMP!

Chinese New Year's Eve

Tonight is Chinese New Year's Eve. In China, New Year's evening is called Ch’u-yeh, the "evening of discarding", because we can finally be done with the old year, and with winter.

This last day of the year is busy for Chinese families, because it’s the last chance to complete preparations and be ready to start the year fresh. When the running around is done, the family spends the rest of the day at home together -- family connections are the big theme for this holiday.

Agenda:

1. Read "Mindfulness-Based Emotional Balance Workbook"

2. Thanksgiving ceremony

3. Welcoming ceremony

4. Have a family open house

Creativity in the New Year

Creativity is one of my leadings: I’m always hungry to get to work on a project. I feel restless, anxious, and eager to make something- a painting, or embroidery, or anything- just to have busy hands and feel productive and creative. 

And I want to express myself, though that which I want to express is often a mystery- it’s the shadowy and bright life inside me; it’s the big truths and the fleeting feelings of the moment.

I want to be more attentive and intentional about my art-making process and my product; more devoted, thoughtful, open, real, original, and honest. And so I hush and wait for ideas. I hold my heart like an empty bowl, waiting for it to be filled. I let the need to create grow and become an obsession, let myself be anxious, and feel happy for this ravenous feeling! As Eric Maisel says, "Both creating and not creating make me anxious, and I choose the anxiety of creating." I choose to have the anxiety of wanting so badly to make art that I must do it every day.

Agenda Today:
1. Review the Divine Laws
2. Prayer candle ceremony
3. Read "The Creativity Book"
4. Brainstorm and simple project list

6. Practice visualization
7. Kitchen blessing

Winter Days of Love

Christmas is over, and Soyal is winding down. We are settling into our new childcare routine, about 30 hours a week. Most of my friends think that sounds like a lot, but we know that these precious days are short: Next fall Grandson #1 will start kindergarten, and we will see him much less.

Today I want to write a bit about the love I feel for my family, and how to maximize the peace we have when we are together. 

Agenda:

1. Review the Divine Laws

2. Prayer candle ceremony

3. Read "Mindfulness-Based Emotional Balance Workbook"

4. Love plans for January

5. Plan a birthday retreat

Invite Equanimity

I long for equanimity, but instead I own this ongoing emotional reactivity: I'm feeling fine, maybe a little tired, and someone says something that pushes a button and I'm suddenly tense and angry; I over-react, I snap out a response, and say something I later regret. I do it to my spouse, my children, grandchildren, friends, and to complete strangers.

In that moment, my perceptions of the situation are altered. The emotional charge prevents me from seeing the situation clearly and calmly. I'm not listening, or analyzing, and I'm not aware of the love I have inside. My emotions and defenses are driving my behaviors.

I've worked and worked on this, and have definitely improved, but not enough. While I want to be accepting of myself, I also deeply desire to be a calmer person. 

I intend to continue to work at growing my equanimity by practicing a Formula for Calm (breath, name feelings, time out), using a trigger journal, and nurturing active listening skills, because I want less unnecessary emotional disturbance, a better relationship with my loved ones, and I want to understand people clearly and honestly. 

Agenda:

1. Formula for Calm

2. Trigger journal

3. Emotions list

4. Read "Comfortable with Uncertainty"

Create Inner Peace

This week of advent my theme is "Striving to find unity and peace with all the people of the world". One way I do that is to create and retain inner peace. Right about now, as the holiday energy builds and social demands increase, I need to review practices that help me to maintain an even-temper, patience, and grounded-ness.

Agenda:

1. Prayer for the light

2. Read "Discover Inner Peace"

3. Light a candle for Peace and Equanimity

4. Daily equanimity practice

5. Daily love journal

Nirvana Day

Today is Nirvana Day, the celebration of Buddha's death at the age of 80, at around 487 BCE. It's celebrated in East Asia on February 15th, or on February 8th by some.

Buddhists celebrate the date of the death of the Buddha, because death is when the soul is released from the body to experience Nirvana. The word Nirvana means "to extinguish", but it's really more of a transformation to a new kind of existence.

Nirvana is usually described as a state of bliss or peace, and a release from all physical suffering. The Buddha taught that Nirvana was beyond human imagination, and so speculation about what Nirvana is like is considered by some to be foolish.

Agenda for today:

1. Read the Buddha's teachings

2. Open to uncertainty
3. Bodhisattva practices
4. Eat a Buddha bowl

New Year's Day

Today is the first day of a new year in my part of the world. I celebrate many beginnings throughout my year, but January 1 has emotional importance because it’s the New Year of my childhood. 

January gets its name from Janus, the two-faced Roman God of gates and doorways; it's a month to look back with reflection and forward with hope. I stand at the doorway of this coming year with my mind open and curious, without fear or judgment, and with hope for the gifts that the year will deliver.

As I stand here, I remember that not all gifts are rosy. I thank the Creator for the shadows and mysteries, and potent gifts of sadness. When I live in the reality of the moment more than in my hopes and expectations, I can receive the riches that are hidden within my most challenging experiences - the gifts of compassion, self-awareness, creativity, wisdom, patience, love, strength of character, and integrity.

Agenda for today:

1. Christmas retreat

2. Kwanzaa principles

3. Set the tone for the New Year

4. Comfortable with Uncertainty

5. Zen pause

6. Make Seed Charms

7. Eat Hoppin' John

Advent Equanimity

Right about now, as the holiday energy builds, I need to review practices that help me to maintain an even-temper, patience, and grounded-ness. I need to work at equanimity.

Equanimity is an expression of love: It’s the serenity we exhibit when we have to wait, and also the kindness we show to those “difficult people” who don’t listen to reason, who interrupt, who are overly sensitive, or who are so annoying. Equanimity allows us to let go of frustration and irritation, and treat those people with skill and gentleness. It allows us to counter disrespect and contempt with compassion, and to remember that human needs are not always logical, but are always more important than our schedule.

Equanimity is a habit that requires love and self-control; it requires that you cut people slack and allow them to be imperfect; that you relax and let go of time anxiety; and that you acknowledge your impatience and irritation but don't act on them. It's powerful; it opens hearts. People feel liberated when you let them know that you are unruffled and in no hurry. Your patience is a gift to them, and will allow them to heal and grow.

And it's not only useful with in-the-moment situations, but also for grounded-ness in the face of world upheaval and fears about the future. Life is a rainbow of chaos, and equanimity is a super-power that will get you through.

Agenda:

1. Daily equanimity practice

2. Daily love journal

3. Take care of myself

A Simple Week

This week will be a little simpler than the last, and maybe a little cooler. A simple life means

• everything in moderation - having just enough interests, activities, and stuff in your life to live comfortably and enjoyably; 
• allowing time and space for the things that really matter-- listening to God, caring for each other, and enjoying simple pleasures;
• being a good caretaker of the earth and using only your share of the earth’s resources.

Agenda:

1. Read Testament of Devotion

2. Simplicity in the kitchen

3. Simplify my diet

4. Internal simplification

Practice Equanimity

Right about now, as the holiday energy builds and social demands increase, I need to review practices that help me to maintain an even-temper, patience, and grounded-ness.

Equanimity is an expression of love: It’s the serenity we exhibit when we have to wait, and also the kindness we show to those “difficult people” who don’t listen to reason, who interrupt, who are overly sensitive, or who are so annoying. Equanimity allows us to let go of frustration and irritation, and treat those people with skill and gentleness. It allows us to counter disrespect and contempt with compassion, and to remember that human needs are not always logical, but are always more important than our schedule.

Equanimity is a habit that requires love and self-control; it requires that you cut people slack and allow them to be imperfect; that you relax and let go of time anxiety; and that you acknowledge your impatience and irritation but don't act on them. It's powerful; it opens hearts. People feel liberated when you let them know that you are unruffled and in no hurry. Your patience is a gift to them, and will allow them to heal and grow.

And it's not only useful with in-the-moment situations, but also for grounded-ness in the face of world upheaval and fears about the future. Life is a rainbow of chaos, and equanimity is a super-power that will get you through.

Agenda:

1. Daily equanimity practice

2. Daily love journal

3. Practice with pleasure and pain

Rohatsu

Rohatsu is Japanese for "eighth day of the twelfth month," so it always falls on December 8th.

Today Japanese Buddhists observe the enlightenment of the Buddha. It's also known as Bodhi Day. Here's the short explanation:

After years of searching for answers, Siddhartha Gautauma finally vowed that he would sit under the Bodhi tree until he found the truth. Siddhartha fasted and meditated under the tree for a week, and on the morning of the eighth day he was enlightened by the principles at the heart of Buddhism. After that he was called the Buddha - The Enlightened One.

In Japanese Zen monasteries, Rohatsu is the last day of a week-long sesshin, an intensive meditation retreat. Participants maintain silent meditation at all times, even while eating and doing chores. And each evening's meditation period gets a little longer, until on this last night they sit up all night. The Rohatsu Retreat gives participants the opportunity to realize their own Buddha nature.

Agenda today:

1. Zazen Meditation

2. Make rice kheer

3. Decorate with a string of colored lights

Nirvana Day

Today is Nirvana Day, the celebration of Buddha's death at the age of 80, at around 487 BCE. It's celebrated in East Asia on February 15th, or on February 8th by some.

Buddhists celebrate the date of the death of the Buddha, because death is when the soul is released from the body to experience Nirvana. The word Nirvana means "to extinguish", but it's really more of a transformation to a new kind of existence.

Nirvana is usually described as a state of bliss or peace, and a release from all physical suffering. The Buddha taught that Nirvana was beyond human imagination, and so speculation about what Nirvana is like is considered by some to be foolish.

Agenda for today:

1. Journal queries
2. Remember my intentions 

3. Read the Buddha's teachings
4. Open to uncertainty
5. Bodhisattva practices
6. Eat a Buddha bowl