New Peony Moon

Beautiful peonies growing in my neighborhood.

The new moon rises today; the Chinese call the fourth new moon the Peony Moon. Peonies are the flower of riches, romance, and honor, called sho yu in Chinese, which means "most beautiful." Their lush blooms are an omen of good fortune, and also foretell a happy marriage.

The new moon is the start of the lunar cycle, a time of high energy and clear thinking. Historically, the new moon is when women took time to be alone; it's a time to retreat, set intentions, and initiate something new.

Agenda:

1. Retreat Day

2. Journal queries

5. Pick a theme

4. Review caregiver resilience

5. Set intentions

1. Retreat Day:

If at all possible, I schedule a day of retreat on the new moon, or near to it: I do less talking, less business, and more personal thought and action. I have two mostly unscheduled days ahead, so my plan is to be as quiet and slow-moving as possible!

2. Journal queries:

What new paths are calling to me?

Where do I need inspiration or a helping hand?

What skills and insights do I have to offer as a team member?

Where am I called to leadership, and what skills do I need to build?

From my journal: We are transitioning into another surgery and recovery time - not what we hoped for this spring. We don't know what this month ahead will bring, but my role is clear: I need to be the glue that holds everything together; calm, and organized, and voicing the emotions out loud. And I need to take care of myself!

3. Pick a theme:

I pick a new theme each month at the new moon - this month it's synergy, the ability to seek unity, embrace teamwork, live holistically, and work tirelessly towards a better end. 

Engagement photo- 1978

Synergy is the eternally active primal force of creation: No matter what the conditions are, they will change. You create synergy in your life when you make the effort to see clearly, stay open-minded, and take persistent right action. Synergy will allow you to experience the people in your life as angels, and the places you live, work, and play as paradise.

My favorite symbol for synergy is our marriage. I use a photo from our youth to remind me that the hard work of being part of a team is ultimately worth the effort.

Another aspect of synergy is wholistic living: Seeing all the roles and aspects of my life as an interconnected system, and creating connections that yield exponentially greater results. That's where simplicity teams up with synergy - to help me to hone in on the most effective way of living. 

Synergy goals might be to better understand different perspectives, become a better teammate or leader, ask for and accept practical help or spiritual guidance, get clarity on the next steps and then have more persistence, or be more open to new paths and changes.

My synergy practices this month:

• Getting into the Weeds: I expect some resistance, but I must insist on clarity with money and other obligations. 
• Teamwork and delegation: Be prepared to communicate my vision, and insist on sharing the work.
• Creative perspective: Use my "New Narrative" journal to practice asking myself questions about challenges and Needs.
• Inner synergy and full-effort: Engage all of myself (physical, mental, spiritual) in my priorities so that I create an explosion of power!

4. Review caregiver resilience:

"About 17 million adults are living with cancer in the United States today. For each patient, a caregiver is sharing in the cancer journey. Caring for a cancer patient is an important job that plays a fundamental role in that patient’s recovery. Being a caregiver comes with its own set of challenges. It’s a role for which most people feel unprepared. It takes time and understanding to adjust to the changes."

The many hats I will wear:

• Medical advocate, navigating the medical system, attending appointments and overseeing paperwork
• Nurse, taking care of the patient’s physical needs
• Counselor, providing emotional support
• Household manager, making meals, laundry, paying bills
• Caring for grandchildren, maximizing love and minimizing stress

I could face caregiver burnout, anxiety, depression, irritability, and resentment. On the other hand, this could bring us closer and strengthen our relationship, and I may learn some new strengths: Forgiveness, compassion, and courage.

We have both been shocked, traumatized, and thrust into an awareness of our mortality. We have no way of knowing how long we will be in this high-anxiety state. If it goes on long enough, we could face PTSD. Also, 

I know that stress is linked with cancer risk and progression, and chronic stress leads to worst outcomes, because it deregulates the immune system, provides proteins to help tumors grow, and even modifies our cells to make them better homes for cancer.

The good news is that stress is one thing we can control. Tips:

• Practice ways to relax.
• Share your feelings honestly.
• Keep a journal to help organize your thoughts.
• When faced with a difficult decision, list the pros and cons for each choice.
• Find a source of spiritual support.
• Set aside time to be alone.
• Remain involved with work and leisure activities as much as you can.
• Be ready to say no. This is the time to focus on you.

5. Set intentions:

Last week I brainstormed some wild and crazy ideas for the end of April and the start of May, and today it's time to narrow it down a little, to the priority items that I could possibly focus on this next month. This isn't a list of the practical things I need to do this month; rather it's my top actions, studies, and growth goals that fit with the "taste" of this month of my life.

Unfortunately, I need to reevaluate and adjust all my ideas, because the Cancer Bombshell. After I list my top goals for the next 30 days, I'm ready to set some intentions for action. I chose a few to write today - those I might act on soon - then I'll work on a few more each day this week.

I intend to pare down to my essential priorities - Family and Earth care: I will choose only three projects to work on at a time, schedule less activity, control the clutter, less spending, and less clinging to control, because no matter what happens going forward, we are going to be under enormous stress this spring, and I need to get a grip!  

 

I intend to help keep the momentum going with my Earthcare team by communicating my vision and then by delegating responsibilities, because quietly supporting synergy and teamwork with my teams is my contribution to the unity of the world.

 

I intend to practice emotional resilience skills (such as mindfulness, purpose, creative perspective, and community-building), because being able to adapt to stressors and bounce back from difficult experiences will allow me to be a wise, flexible, creative, hopeful, and positive leader for my family, community, and for the earth. 

 

I intend to be proactive with caretaking by having all the information I need, and asking the best questions; Also, I will help with organization and helper synergy, and make sure we take time to have fun together; AND in the moment, give attention to how I am contributing; plus also protect my own self care and stress levels, because my purpose right now is to love and serve my partner and my family, and my superpower is to be prepared, friendly, and calm.